SO I’ve come to realize that I really suck at this blogging thing, but looking back at my older posts I am so happy I took the time to write down what was going on both in my heart and also in my head :) It is such a great testimony of God’s faithfulness and provision! I am in awe at His awesomeness!
I am going to attempt to do my best to tell you what has happened since I posted almost a year ago. John would tell you that there is no such thing as the Reader’s Digest Version when it comes to me, but I am going to do my best to give you a rundown of what has been happening with our family.
Last fall is a bit of a blur, but here is what I remember. I was blessed to go to the Philippines for almost 3 weeks to help keep an eye on things while the director was in Australia speaking and counseling at an adoption conference. It was such a blessing, but it was also such a test. I found myself feeling very lonely and having to lean on God in a very different way. Here is my journal from that day…
“Today I was done. I don’t even know why. Nothing really changed. The kids were a bit rough today and that was frustrating, but it was done before that. For one I think I tried to do too much. Number two I was trying to do things on my own. Number three I am losing my love and patience with baby B.
I miss Hayden and Hannah and John.
I think I would do better with another adult here (not Filipino) because it just isn’t the same. I think today I realized how lonely I was. I am not depending on God. He is here and yet I feel alone. I need to remember –‘I cannot. God can. I will let Him.’”
I have been separated from my family many times and I have lived in a whole new place, but here I found myself facing both at the same time. I was away from John and the two older kids and during the daytime I was the only “white” person around. I knew that God was with me and I had to lean on him multiple times/days as I had to make decisions and do the best I could. I felt as if it were one of those moments where I really understood the verse
“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.’ 2 Corinthians 12:9
|Ate Cher returns home!|
One of the most beautiful highlights of that trip was on my first trip I connected with a sibling group of 3 and really felt that God was asking me to pray for these children and their future family. While I was there I was told that they had been matched. After 6 years of being patient, God supplied their forever family. Not only was it a true moment of beauty, but as it turned out, their family lives about 5-6 hours north of where John grew up.
|Visiting with the fam and|
eating at Steak n' Shake!
|At opening ceremonies :)|
|John and I at the closing ceremonies!|
We were exhausted!
|A blessed forever family!|
To wrap things up in the last year I have experienced and grown SO much! Its amazing to look back and see the many wonderful friends that have surrounded us with caring for our kids, being a sounding board, supporting us through our highs/lows, and the countless times they have shown us grace as we continue to learn what it means to be in ministry and to be a part of this great community. I miss family and friends back home. Some days are harder than others, but then I take the time to look back and I see how much I could have missed and all I can do is say “thank you”. Thank you to a loving Heavenly Father who is not some far off father, but one who is ever present with me wherever he sends me. Thank you to a church family that continues to surround us with support. Thank you to friends who are faithful and give us a much needed sense of community. Thank you to a family that encourages us and loves us from afar.